There are many reasons that can contribute to a divorce. There may be no one single reason that contributes to the breakdown of a marriage, but rather a combination of factors and issues, both big and small. Here are common 16 reasons that lead to a divorce.
Table of Contents
- 1. Too much conflict and arguing
- 2. Domestic violence
- 3. Infidelity
- 4. Lack of communication
- 5. Lack of commitment
- 6. Addiction
- 7. Lack of intimacy or sex
- 8. Lack of trust or unwillingness to trust
- 9. Financial problems
- 10. Different personalities
- 11. Incompatible interests
- 12. Marrying too young
- 13. Issues with family
- 14. Lack of support from family
- 15. Physical limitations
- 16. Health problems
1. Too much conflict and arguing
Conflict and arguing is a common factor in most divorces. It can be anything from disagreements over the children, financial status, household duties and chores, social life, or pets (yes that’s right) and everything in between.
No one likes to argue. It hurts relationships and even though we might think we’re arguing for a good reason, it can cause more damage than good.
2. Domestic violence
Domestic violence is such a serious issue and it’s sad that anyone would even consider abusing someone they say they love. It can be physical, verbal, psychological and financial. There are many ways in which an abuser manipulates their victim. Victims of domestic violence often feel trapped and scared. They’re made to believe they’re responsible for their abuser’s behavior and that they would be in more danger if they left.
Domestic violence is not acceptable in any marriage. We all disagree with our spouse from time to time, but that doesn’t mean we have the right to take out our anger on them physically or emotionally.
If you do suffer from this kind of abuse then please get help! Tell someone about it and hopefully your friends and family can talk some sense into you, otherwise it may lead to a divorce.
Another common reason for divorce is infidelity. Extramarital affairs just aren’t acceptable and if you manage to catch your spouse in the act, unless they’re willing to go on some marital counseling and make amends, then it’s time to start looking for an apartment.
If you no longer feel like you’re in love with your spouse and they can tell, it may be time to consider divorce.
It might seem cruel but if you find yourself falling for someone else then there’s not much that can be done about it. You shouldn’t try to keep the relationship going with your spouse out of guilt or obligation, that wouldn’t be fair to anyone.
It can be hard when you feel like your spouse doesn’t love you anymore but if they’re not willing to talk about the relationship then the only other option is divorce.
So please try and communicate with them! Don’t let their feelings be the final word in this because maybe they just need a little push in the right direction.
4. Lack of communication
Someone not talking to you is a huge problem in any relationship. If you can’t communicate with your spouse about your feelings, problems, everyday conversations and so on, it makes it very difficult to fix whatever the problem is.
If you have been with your spouse for a long time and you feel as though the spark has gone out of your marriage, it could be because you have grown apart.
For long distance marriages, this becomes almost impossible if one spouse moves away and the other stays behind. Most likely they will want to split up because it would be too difficult to maintain a relationship with such a huge gap in a remote relationship.
If you try to communicate with your spouse and let them know how you’re feeling, then hopefully they can see where you’re coming from.
5. Lack of commitment
If you feel like your husband or wife isn’t committed to the marriage, then you might want to start looking for a way out. It may seem like they’re committed to the relationship but if it changes from one day to the next and they won’t tell you why, it’s time to search your feelings and think about whether staying will only lead to heartbreak in the future.
Lack of commitment can be caused by many things such as previous relationships, financial problems or even illness, don’t let it blow up in your face.
Addictions can be anything from drinking too much, smoking cigarettes or drugs to a gambling addiction or spending problem.
If your spouse has an addiction then get them help and find out what it is. It may seem like there’s no way out but with the right kind of help you might just save your marriage.
7. Lack of intimacy or sex
Intimacy and sex are very important in any marriage. If you feel like your spouse isn’t interested in you, it makes it difficult to get close with them and can eventually lead to a lack of communication because how do you talk about something that never gets brought up?
If your spouse isn’t interested in sex or intimacy then gently bring it up. It might be due to a loss of interest in you, stress or something else entirely but don’t allow them to shut the conversation down.
8. Lack of trust or unwillingness to trust
If there’s no trust between you and your partner then the relationship won’t work. It’s as simple as that.
If you feel like your spouse doesn’t trust you enough or is unwilling to trust you for a long time, then it may be time to get a divorce. The relationship can’t work without trust and if they’re not willing to try then there’s no point in staying together.
9. Financial problems
If your spouse is struggling with debt or not making enough money to support the family, it can lead to a lot of problems. If your partner isn’t willing to find a better paying job then you might have to face financial issues as well as emotional problems.
It’s understandable if you don’t want to work another job because you’re exhausted but please communicate with your wife or husband.
10. Different personalities
If your partner’s personality is drastically different than yours then it might not work. You need to be able to communicate and understand each other or you won’t get far together.
So please try and work together! It’s important that you are both on the same page about what you want from life, otherwise there will be problems later down the line.
11. Incompatible interests
If you and your significant other have completely different interests then it might not work out. It’s normal to want a little bit of space so please try and compromise or else you won’t be happy. You don’t want to spend all of your time with one person because it will make things boring, but at the same time you need to make sure that you are both happy.
So please come up with a solution that benefits both of you. You don’t want to be spending half of your time alone because your partner is off doing something else, but at the same time if you’re bored then there might be problems in the future.
12. Marrying too young
If you’re still young and inexperienced when you get married then it might not work.
It’s normal to feel like this when you’re young because you don’t know any better but if your partner is making uneducated mistakes because they don’t have enough life experience, then maybe it may be the time for a divorce.
Maybe they’ve made bad choices in the past and it’s led them down a bad path but they can learn from their mistakes. If they’re willing to talk about things then you might be able to work through this together.
So please try and communicate with each other and see if you can come up with a solution that benefits both of you.
13. Issues with family
Before you choose a spouse you should know if they have issues with their parents because it can cause many fights in the future. If your partner doesn’t get along well with their mother or father then it might lead to problems later on.
The best way to avoid this is by sitting down with your spouse and their family members beforehand. It might not seem like a big deal at the time but it will save you all of the stress in the future.
14. Lack of support from family
If your family doesn’t support you and your partner getting married then there might be problems down the road. It’s difficult to marry someone if all of your family and friends disapprove.
The best way to avoid this is by having a candid conversation with those closest to you before marriage. They might not understand at first but please try and encourage them to support your marriage. This is a big step in your life so you need all of the support that you can get.
So please try not to rush into things because it will cause problems later on. It’s better if everyone is aware of what’s going on so it’s okay to take some extra time before tying the knot.
15. Physical limitations
If either spouse has some kind of physical limitation that makes it difficult to have a functional marriage, e.g. if they are wheelchair bound, then it may be time to seek marital counseling.
If your spouse is unable to carry out certain tasks because of a physical disability then please don’t take it personally. They’re not trying to hurt you but they need assistance that you can provide for them.
16. Health problems
If either one of you has a serious health problem, then it can lead to problems in the relationship.
It’s understandable if your partner doesn’t want to put you through the stress and pain of their illness, but at the same time you should be there for them.
There might not seem like there’s much that you can do but just being there can sometimes be enough. They might not want to talk about it but just being there for them will help them out a lot!
It’s understandable if you don’t have the energy to deal with their issues because they obviously have a lot of problems themselves so please try and support them as best you can.