Being in love is one of the greatest feelings in the world. You feel like you’re on top of the world, and nothing could possibly bring you down. However, this love that once made you so happy can evolve into something else over time.
Love bombing is a relatively unknown term for many, and even fewer know what it actually is. But if you’re in a relationship where the early signs of affection seem overly generous, it can be worthwhile finding out more about what it is.
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What Is It?
Bombing in love happens when one person is very affectionate, attentive, and generous towards the other but with a hidden agenda. The person will shower the other person with all the love in the world to manipulate or control them later in their relationship.
For people looking from the outside, the relationship can look highly affectionate. It can look like one person (the controller or manipulator) is exceptionally loving towards their partner. However, the same person can turn manipulative, abusive, and even dishonest in private. The ‘love bomber’ will do anything to boost their ego while simultaneously holding power over the other person.
Signs to Watch Out for
Not everyone necessarily knows what to look out for when it comes to love bombing. Because the phenomenon is not very well-known, many people just chalk it up to being in relationships. However, if you notice these signs or situations in your relationship or partner, it might be possible that love bombing is happening:
- Placing excessive demands on your attention and time
- Coercing/persuading you to make commitments early on in the relationship
- Continually keeping tabs on you
- Making you feel guilty for not spending time with them
- Making elaborate and excessive romantic gestures early on in the relationship
If you notice any of these signs in your partner or relationship dynamic, it can be essential to get a third person’s advice on what’s happening. A counselor can analyze the situation and let you know what’s happening.
Why It’s Easy Not to Notice
While grandiose and over-the-top gestures are common when you’re on social media and watching any media, they might be less common in real life. When they find a partner willing to make these elaborate gestures, many people may feel more loved than they have ever been. It can make it easy to miss signs of love bombing, especially when you are desperate for love.
However, over time, the same love can instill a sense of fear and suffocation in you, and it’s important to realize when the situation is becoming bleak. Being objective and non-emotional is very challenging, which is why a counselor can help. You don’t need to feel coerced to do things repeatedly for your partner, and it’s crucial to get help when you need it.
When to Get Help from a Counselor
Love bombing is still a relatively unknown issue, and when you’re looking to find out whether you’re a victim, a counselor can help. You need to be honest and trusting with any counselor you choose to get in touch with, so they can help you out. Once you begin to feel like you’re not in a healthy relationship, you need to start watching for signs of this particular illness, so you can take steps when required.